Saturday, January 16, 2010

Comment Snob

Full disclosure, I wrote this Thursday night. If you commented on my post on Friday I love you and this has nothing to do with you, it's all my own failings. And so I give you:

Comment Snob.

Just to be clear, I'm talking about myself. I have become... a comment snob.

Yes, in just the span of weeks, during which I really worked my blog and my networking and visited a whole lot of your blogs and commented wherever I could and emailed back right away... during those weeks I could be guaranteed at least a few comments on each of my blog posts. It was quite nice... and I have gotten used to it. I have become a comment-expecting snob.

Unfortunately, it didn't last. (The constant commenting, that is. And maybe it's fortunate, given the realization that I came to)

On Thursday I posted something I was super-proud of... my new email signature. A small thing, but it had meaning to me. I eagerly roll-called over at SITS, a blog devoted to sharing and supporting other bloggers, one where commenting on each others' posts is a way of life, and then....


I kid you not, I actually went back to SITS and tracked down my comment to make sure I'd saved it. Because how dare someone roll-call and NOT come read my excellently-written and witty post? How DARE they not comment???

Wow. Crazy much? (The answer is yes. And if by some chance you are reading this, Ms. Commented-after-me-on-Thursday, I do humbly apologize. I don't mean to disparage you so much as myself here.)

So then, Thursday evening I checked my email and lo and behold, I received a comment! One of my lovely followers, Katie, left me some kind words. Hooray for her. And hooray for my inner monster.

What I found rather funny, and not at all Freudian, is the fact that when I was typing my response email to her and explaining that I had become a comment snob and so was eternally grateful that she had, in fact, commented, I actually typed "comment snot" by mistake. (And you know what, Freud? I did it again just now.)

You see, there's a difference between being a Comment Snob and a Comment Snot. It's like Coffee Snobs. They can be a pain in the butt if you're somewhere (like, say outer Mongolia) and there's no Starbucks. But at least they know what they're talking about. "Coffee Snot" reminds me of some high school kid who thinks she knows what she's doing but only just two weeks ago found out that frappachinos have espresso in them. (No wonder you like them, hello.)

So yeah, a Comment Snot is, in my mind, someone who knows enough about how things work (or ought to) to sound like she knows what she's saying. Yes, commenting is a lovely wonderful thing. It is not, however, a pre-requisite to having your own blog. And for that matter, if you're reading this thinking "hey now, she hasn't commented on my blog in forever!" yes, you're right. I've only had just enough time in each day to write two blog posts, roll-call, look at the featured blogger, and comment on the one person ahead of me on the roll-call. That's it. So I do think I have not yet even attained the mastery of blogging that is being a Comment Snob, because I have not been doing it enough myself.

Nope, I'm just a whiny, self-absorbed snot who needs affirmation and has decided that it comes in the form of comments.

And what, you may ask, makes this post about being a snot Extraordinary? Why, the fact that I actually A) discovered something about myself and B) admitted it to all of you. That's pretty darned extraordinary to me. :)

If you're not afraid of stroking my comment ego, please let me know how you deal with getting (or not getting) tons of comments.


  1. Well, for me, I just kept commenting and commenting and commenting on other people's blogs until they finally consistently commented on mine. But I still get days on my two blogs where there is hardly anything or nothing at all.

    As for you? I just had like four of your posts just randomly appear in my Google it's possible other folks are having the same issues?

  2. Like Mad Woman, new posts aren't always generated on time in my reader.

    When I first started blogging, I lived for comments. When I didn't receive any, I thought "What the heck!!"

    Now? I enjoy writing too much to care about comments. Don't get me wrong, comments help me continue to write. Yet, they do not control whether I post or not.

    When I am a regular commenter on another person's blog, it is because I appreciate their content.
    That is what I want in a reader: someone that enjoys my blog and will come back willingly.

    I hope that makes sense.

    STILL...on those days when I only get one comment...I feel kinda bad. That is when I get out the chocolate.

  3. I don't worry too much about numbers of comments - I know I don't comment on every post I read, and it's not that I haven't enjoyed reading, just that I don't always have something to say. The comments I'm not keen on are the 'obligation' comments (from some SITS folk) who plainly skipped the post & went straight to the comment form.

  4. Thanks for stopping by on my SITS day! I LOVED all the comment love and now I'm here to spread it around!

    Love that I'm commenting on a comment about commenting because you left a THAT'S funny!

  5. The blogosphere is so weird. You write a post that you feel is your finest hour of work and nothing. The next day you phone it in and you are showered. It's very strange.

  6. I love comments too and had somehow decided that the amount of comments is how good the post is. So, I agree with the post above, you never know what is going to connect to the readers. I try to comment back on several of the roll callers above me and then wonder, should I comment on the roll callers below me? Do I have that kind of time....

    Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!

  7. I've had the same experience in the blogosphere. I was the FB at SITS in early December and got 180+ comments. I dutifully replied to all of them, and not in the ADHD manner common among some of the SITS folks. Do you think many of them responded? Nope. I've got a loyal group of blog friends, but I'm not thinking I'll get many more than I have now. And that's fine. I'm getting carpal tunnel syndrome as it is. I'm content in my own little world.

    And on a related topic, I've started this weekly blog banter. I post about all things blog on Mondays. I think we need to have an e-mail convo. Please look me up. And BTW, I did find you at the SITS Roll Call this a.m. Nice to meet you!

  8. Comments are so addicting- I want more and more and more! But, it is hard to tell what will get comments and what won't.

  9. Hi, Coming to you by way of SITS. SOmetimes I fee the same way. I just kept at it..Finially one day it paid off. It did take me a while and yes, I was disappointed many times. Believe me it will pay off.

  10. hilarious. and so true. i do the same thing. before sits, i never cared about comments, never expected them...just always hoped someone, anyone might be reading. now, if i don't get a comment i get upset and think i'm a horrible blogger and no one wanted to leave a comment. hahaha. miss you janet!

  11. Yeah, I struggle w/ this. Sometimes I have to check my I commenting just to get a comment back? Then I feel sort of shallow (which I admit to sometimes!). And it is hard when you do feel like you've written a great post and no one comments. Then, I'm tempted to try to be gimmicky - but am I doing just to get readers? Then sometimes, I do sincerely read others' blogs b/c I know how good it feels when someone reads mine.

    There is so much out there to read, and honestly, it is hard to keep up and have a life. I guess where I am landing is that the key is sincerity.

    It is good to comment on others' blog if you are sincere and aren't just doing it for the return comment. And I hope people will comment on my blog out of sincerity and not just obligation - that doesn't feel good to me and I'm sure it doesn't feel good when someone else can see through my comments.

    And I guess the ones who are sincere will keep coming back, b/c they actually liked your blog. And those are the followers we want- the ones we connect w/ and feel a genuine 'sisterhood' with.

    Does that make sense????

    I'm learning though. God is dealing w/ me about ego and motives via blogworld, lol.

  12. I usually just keep commenting on other people's blogs. I remember the first time I did, what I like to call, Binge Commenting - where I just sat on the computer and commented FOREVER - and then throughout the next few days I only received maybe three or four comments. I internally whined about it to myself. I sit here and take the time to comment on all these blogs, and nothing. But you know what, maybe it's the right thing to just give to someone without expecting anything in return. In fact, I know that's how it's supposed to be. A lot of times we do things for people and expect nothing back. Why should blogging be any different? If we only received two or so comments on a single post, at least we got to someone. We could've got nothin'. And I really appreciate you writing this post because I can resonate with it, and it helped me realize something about myself as well! And I always appreciate a person who can help me change myself. :)

  13. I'm a lot like Rachel. I didn't really worry or think about comments until SITS, and now if I don't get at least one comment on a post, I feel a little let down. Then I just remind myself that I'm not doing this for anyone else...I'm selfishly writing for and about me. It is definitely nice to get comments to know that people are reading, because that makes me WANT to write more, but I've learned that comments aren't necessary.

    I do get annoyed at the "phone in comments" like "Hi! Just stopping by from SITS." But, a comment is a comment, so I accept them all. I also try my best to respond to comments via email or by commenting on the commenters blog. I think that helps the comments keep coming, because people like validation.

    I like your blog, so I'm going to become a follower! :-)

  14. Loved the fruedian thing!
    Sometimes you just have to remember that people do get busy, but they will be back.
    I know that if I don't go comment on other's blogs I don't get very many comments either. But I don't worry too much about it. I figure that I can always build up my reading another day. As for those posts that I really want people to read, I go visit everyone that I know. It always draws more people when you go around and comment and leave an invitation. I enjoy blogging simply for blogging, it's not high matience unless you make it that way.
    I am sorry that you were offended, and that I was a part of it. I haven't stopped by and commented in several days. I have had one of those weeks where I have just posted and left it to fate. I have done very little visiting.
    I hope that you will have a better week. :)

  15. I'm not gonna lie. I am a complete and utter comment junkie. Part of it is that I truly enjoy the interactive part of blogging. I am aware though that much of the reason I get comments is that I give comments. I comment so much that I have a regular Monday feature called I Comment Therefore I Am. Early on in my life as a blogger I decided that I would not post every day. That freed up time to visit other blogs and comment. I also find that I get more comments on my posts if I don't post everyday. People are busy and might only have time to read one post.

  16. Hello!
    Thank you so much for visiting my blog and your kind words of encouragement on my new healthy life. I feel like a new person these days and I'm very blessed and grateful. Yay!

    Your blog is so witty and just wonderful! What a precious post about blog comments. I do receive many comments simply beacause I talk so much. He! I answer EVERYONE who comments to me and then some. I just adore making new blog friends and chatting.

    Come by and visit with me anytime my friend!

    Many blessings to you and yours.
    ~Warmly, ~Melissa :)

  17. Well dear Comment Snot(b), my way of dealing with comment snobbery is to just remember why I started blogging in the first place. I have something to say. There are emotions, thoughts, and ideas inside of me that need to get out. Sure, check your comments, reply back, comment on other blogs... but remember why you do this in the first place.

    You love to write!

  18. lol at the Freudian slips!

    As for me...I'm usually pleasantly surprised when I get comments on a post I didn't really expect anyone to care about--one I write for me. I guess sometimes what I have to say strikes a chord with more than I expect.

    Soooo, I try to remember that when I don't get any or as many comments as I thought I would on other posts.

    Not that that's easy.
    But I TRY to have perspective.

  19. Well now look at all the comments you have here! I just found you at Unknown Mami.
    I have a super busy life but love blogging, I tend to be a comment back-er most of the time but check in on the blogs I follow and new ones that look interesting whenever I have a little extra time :-)

  20. We are all human and want to be accepted for who we are. In the bloggy world we view that acceptance as our comments and our followers. It's easy to get so wrapped up in the numbers of comments and the number of followers that we forget why we blog in the first place.

    Stay true to your vision of your blog and just keep writing. Everything works the way it is supposed to....


  21. I came by here because of Unknown Mami - I found this post to be SO true! I've been blogging every day for over a year now and I've got a cool half million on my Google reader (or at least I feel like it LOL) so I'm totally snob material with a little bit of snot mixed in LOL

    Nice to meet ya!
    Kristin - The Goat


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