Tuesday, December 1, 2009
You're So Cute I Want to Hurt You
I have a friend who is a wonderful mother. I mean it. She's got a husband and five boys and still manages to sleep and take care of everyone who comes within 3 miles of her house. She just oozes maternal comfort and love.
And she wants to eat your children.
Have you ever seen a baby that's so cute you have to come up with words to describe how cute they are? And do you find yourself using food and eating-related words? What are we, cannibals? But how often have you said this: "You're so cute I want to eat you!" or "You're so cute I want to squish you!"
Wait a second! Now, I don't have any children, but wouldn't you as a mother kinda freak out if someone walked up to you at the park or--worse yet--church, and said "Your baby is so adorable I want to eat him up?" aaahhh!
So, yeah, we's weird people. Not that I'm any different. I say the same things. Especially when I see my friend Heather's baby (photo above). Except the only difference is I generally take it to the hyperbolic level. You should try it sometime. Next time you see a cute kid, go up to them and say "You're so adorable I want to commit bodily harm upon your person."
Just make sure the mother knows you're kidding. :)